Cruel Intentions – Sarah Jessica Parker Horse Painting

The biggest question emerging from the Sarah Jessica Parker horse painting is: when it comes to celebrities, where do we draw the line? Sure they live in the land of fame and fortune and seem to have absolutely everything bigger and better than the average person, but does this make them impervious to derisive laughter over the way they look?  Poor SJP, she’s simply trying to sell another perfume like J-Lo, Gwen Stefani and the countless other female stars out there, can’t she get a break?  The now infamous artist of the gibelike painting, 14, thinks not. She posted it on her blog, Gallery of the Absurd, with every intention to provoke while denying outright cruelty.  14 tells E-Online, “I don’t feel comfortable teasing people about the way they look. But at the same time, my artistic mission for [the blog] is to observe and record the social commentary springing from celebrity gossip.”

So does this mean she’s just the messenger or the creator of the message SJP=horseface?

She said that she was initially going to paint Rumer Willis but decided against it, “Yes, I might giggle a little when a blogger posts a bad photo of Rumer and calls her a tater head,” she says. “But I feel like she’s still a kid and didn’t want to hurt her feelings.”

That seems a little unfair. Why conclude that SJP is less sensitive than a younger celeb and why deny Rumer of an adult celebrity roasting? If that’s all it is.

Many believe that stars ask for an uncensored lambasting the moment they claim the spotlight, but to paint someone as a blooming horse is just plain cruel.  Heck, most of us are still wounded over something said to us in junior high school. I don’t think any amount of fame or fortune can take away the smarting slap of someone criticizing your looks. Nevertheless, it has been proven time and again that if people are not busy lauding the few they’ve placed on pedestals, then they are busy knocking them down with insults.  The reasoning being that stars dwell so many levels above the rest of us and so can never really be hurt by what we hurl at them. This may be true.  After all, I’ve never stopped an A-lister to ask. But in the end, are such efforts at blatant mockery necessary? I say neigh.

‘Honey, I’m on a Call’

Milla Jovovich is one of a few models who can grab your attention faster than the clothes they are wearing.  She never fails to captivate us, and in Harper’s Bazaar’s latest photo spread, Mr. Big Gets Downsized, she combines her model presence with her thespian talents to portray the modern day power woman.  Jovovich plays the role beautifully in a series of photos that follow a ‘day in the life’ of a female breadwinner.  The clothes are superbly styled and succeed in reinventing what business attire means for women today.  The sets are crafted to be tongue-in-cheek and show Chris Noth, aka Mr. Big, playing the bewildered homemaker, while Jovovich reigns as corner office queen.  The contrastive roles are simply brilliant and it is particularly amusing to see Big miles away from the chauffeured limos and cocktail bars of Manhattan, and instead, elbow-deep in flour and Cheerios.

New iPhone Unveiled

Apple Inc. released the newest version of the iPhone Monday, called the iPhone 3G-S. (the S stands for speed, not super stylish) The new model boasts a three-megapixel camera that shoots video, an internal digital compass and voice-control features that let owners use spoken commands to make calls and play music. (In other words: “iPhone: call my BFF and play Britney now!”) The first generation 3G was hardly your father’s beta device. The phone was next to perfect, with only a few elements causing complaint, such as its inability to use flash and the minor difficulty of the keyboard (things only guys seemed to care about).  Apple also announced that the iPhone 3G-S will look physically similar t0 the current version but will have significant software improvements. The most impressive news, however, is the price tag – $199 for the 16-gigabyte version. That’s less than an hour spent at Holt Renfrew’s last call! According to Rogers’ tweet, it is available June 19, so we needn’t wait long. No doubt the most enviable feature is Apple’s Application Store, where a myriad of applications are introduced daily. I have a few favorites of my own - I suggest Vogue’s application Style.com - a go-to app for all fashionistas. It loads all of the latest runway collections in glossy, high resolution shots, that are only a sweeping tap away.  Another must have, and actually the first one I downloaded a year ago, is Chanel’s Application. It provides up-to-the-minute news on the luxury brand and even has complete videos of the runway shows.   Elle Canada also has an application which reports on news and celebrity gossip, while offering their daily style tips.  To manage your closet, I recommend Touch Closet, an application that lets you take photos of your wardrobe and then helps you create outfits with your own best pieces - just like Cher in Clueless!  Thanks to Apple and their new iPhone 3G-S, we’ll be able to keep up with the latest trends faster than ever. Now if only we could give the command:  ”iPhone: Put latest Louboutin’s in my closet!”

Tony Awards Red Carpet

“Billy Elliot” the Musical, Elton John’s latest opus, may have danced away with 8 wins at Sunday night’s Tony Awards, but who dominated the red carpet?  Miss Anne Hathaway. Once again, our favorite red carpet darling achieves the fine balance of classic black with a flirtatious touch of color.  Her red shoes complement the embroidered tulle of her Oscar de la Renta and draw the eye to her magnificent legs, revealing a little more than expected. I simply love satin in the springtime! Bravo Anne! (Applause)  Style winners parading the entryway of Radio City Music Hall included the lovely Josefina Scaglione (West Side Story) in a captivating teal, Marcia Gay Hardan in a similar shade, Jane Fonda in an jewel cinched gown, and Laura Benanti in an aqua stunner. Representing the men was Neil Patrick Harris in a slim lined tux with a hint of 1950s luster.  Failing to receive acclaim were the concoctions of fabric worn by Lauren Graham in an unsightly green, Piper Perebo in a sac made of hotel drapes and Edie Falco in an overly ruched letdown. For full red carpet coverage go here and for a behind the scenes play-by-play visit Vulture.

See you in September

Marc Jacobs Fall 2009

Is it just me, or are we all waiting for the leaves to turn red? I’ve never sensed so much excitement over the emergence of Fall collections.  Everyone is waiting with bated breath to wear the latest booties and luscious fabrics.  Personally, I want to mimic the runways and wear jet tights now – with everything! Alas, it just looks silly in June, so I’ll have to wait, or at least settle for a pair of footless Wolfords. Pucci prints have never been so boring – give me Marc Jacobs yellow velvet and Chanel green tweed, thank you. Even celebrity stylists are skipping strait to Fall runways – think everyone at the Met Gala and celebs on talk shows (Gwenyth Paltrow in a fab Marc Jacobs on Conan O’Brien last week).  If only we were celebrities or living in Alaska – then we wouldn’t have to wait!

Think Pink!

Those of you who work in a corporate office and dread your morning attire of grey suits and dowdy black cardigans must check out the lovely Thomas Pink boutique. Sure, we would all love to dress like a fashion editor but the boardroom is not always Marni conducive. Thomas Pink will breathe life into your closet of dull pantsuits. The collar shirts are well tailored to the female form. I tried many on during my last trip to NYC and they fit wonderfully – no peek-a-boo slits between buttons and the French cuffs are simply divine. You feel ready to tackle any meeting and slightly sexy at the same time. Try the Egyptian stripe double cuff. Besides, cufflinks are the new cocktail rings! Thomas Pink has an impressive collection from silver Pink Panthers to Elephants and crystal hearts. Go for drinks after work, lose your blazer and voila! – a detail to your outfit that sparkles and shines while maintaining your professional esthetic. Being part of the boy’s club has never felt so feminine!

First Love

I believe in love at first sight. When I first discovered this photo it was as if Cupid had struck me with an atelier arrow – Danielle, meet high fashion; your soul mate.
I was a junior at a boarding school in Nova Scotia, where Gossip Girl was over a decade away and polyester tunics and cotton ties were the extent of our daily couture. Our greatest form of self-expression was how we decorated our dorm rooms, or of course, how we worked our latest pair of penny loafers. Not many things added glamour to our everyday life (knee socks only came in so many styles) so I turned to the many fashion magazines my Mother sent me in monthly parcels. This image was the first to act as a shrine on my wall. I sat on my bed and stared at it whenever I suffered from whatever teenagers suffer or procrastinated during our mandatory homework sessions.
Attired in a Crayola-box of matching minis, the supermodels we now know and love utterly fascinated me. They were so connected as a group and yet so individually strong at the same time. I was hooked, and at 14 I had outgrown Seventeen. Soon I was collecting all the Versace ads as fervently as the boys were collecting hockey cards. I knew all the key players by name, what brands they were campaigning and what shows they were scheduled to walk. My room became a collage of glamour shots, floor to ceiling, which even landed a spot in the yearbook.
Discovering a world of splendor in the pages of Vogue, Elle and Bazaar was awe-inspiring. I owe much of my appreciation for all things glamourous to this photo.  It will always be my first love.

Ground Control To Major Tom

Space Invaders on the scene! Astronauts are all the rage this summer as Louis Vuitton dedicates their latest site and ads to Buzz Aldrin, Sally Ride and Jim Lovel.  Celebrating the 40th anniversary of the Apollo 11, they also honour the pioneers of space exploration.  It is an impressive departure from the self-absorbed stellium of megastars that usually promote the brand.  Also, check out Verameat jewellery for some original moonwalking pieces.  They have a fantastic array of unusual charms, rings, and earrings available in either gold or silver. Along with astronauts, top picks are the killer scuba diver, a man painting the town red, and a hungry shark hippo. Roger that!

The Scrunchie Revival

When SATC devoted an entire episode to the scrunchie debate, Carrie proved to Berger that no “self-respecting NYC woman would be caught dead running around Manhattan in a scrunchie”. Thanks to American Apparel, however, it looks like Berger has finally been vindicated.  The fashion atrocity we sported in the ’80s is attempting a shameless revival.  I know what scruchie is thinking: “If Neon and Leg Warmers are coming back then why can’t I?”.  Well, Carrie certainly lost her argument  the second she decided to wear a gargantuan scrunchie as a sash.  Things do look larger on the silver screen! Ok Scrunchie, we will allow you another 15 minutes.

Hello Cupcake!

Add some sugar to your summer style with Sydney Evan’s Cupcake necklace. This 14k gold delectable is topped with pink sapphire sprinkles. Available at Bergdorf’s and Neiman’s for $700, but also available online at Max and Chloe’s for $615.  Now that’s a sweet deal!